Pink Shirts... and The Questions They Pose

I saw a guy wearing a pink shirt that said "Don't laugh, this is your girlfriend's shirt." I wasn't laughing... but I was wondering why my girlfriend would own a shirt that says "Don't laugh, this is your girlfriend's shirt."... and why did she never mention it?

Cleaning Up Their Act

Why are homeless people so dirty? All They do is just stand there with a sign. You'd think they'd be able to stay pretty clean.

Changing Trends

You used to get made fun of for wearing a shirt with a "fag tag" on the back. But now it would probably be cool as part of the whole Metro-sexual fashion style.

Unique Fashion

Dress socks are like a snowflakes... no two pairs look the same. Unless you just buy black socks, then you're probably not open-minded enough to see my point.

Stereotypes...

A lot of people don't believe in stereotypes. To those people I say "Sony!"... Now that is clearly a type of stereo.

Is Awesome a Color?

I believe that one way to tell a person's favorite color is by what they wear the most. That's why I can honestly say that my favorite color is "Awesomeness".

Misunderstood Passion

If you saw a fat person with chocolate all over their lips you'd probably think they're disgusting. But what if that chocolate was from a Hershey Kiss? Then they're just passionate.

"The Q Effect"

We don't really need the letter "Q" in the alphabet. However, we keep it in there so when playing Scrabble, someone always gets screwed because they picked up a Q but don't have a U... Experts call this phenomenon, "The Q Effect".

Covered in Shame

Some people choose pencils over pens because you can erase your mistakes. However, you can't erase the fact that now you're covered in eraser shavings because you're a mistake-making idiot who should of been fired two weeks ago.

A Miracle Cure

While using the Teacher's restroom at school, I noticed a can of disinfectant. On this very special can was a list of all the bacteria and germs it killed. Included in this list was none other than AIDS... Apparently we can not cure AIDS, unless of course it's on a toilet seat. In that case we can just spray it to death... Long story short, I stole the disinfectant and plan on bathing in the stuff regularly.

Everything has its Opposite

I believe the opposite of "Lottery" is "Pregnancy Scare".

There Can Only Be One... SUV

A big question is which SUV is actually the safest to drive. Allow me to clear this up for everyonel... The Toyota Highlander is the safest SUV to drive. Why? you ask, well it's actually pretty obvious... Everyone knows that You can not kill a Highlander. Highlanders are immortal and can only be killed by other Highlanders. So clearly I would feel a whole lot safer in my immortal Toyota Highlander than in your lame Nissan Xterra... I hope I was able to answer everyone's questions.

Noticeable Whites & Invisible Shoes

Why do people make such a big deal about mixing their colors and their whites when doing laundry? Who cares if your whites get messed up... nobody sees em'. If I do my laundry and find a pink sock instead of a white one all it means is I can't wear my invisible shoes that day.

A Special Day

Most people remember taking school pictures when they were younger. I, on the other hand, fondly think of it as "Free Comb Day."

Let's touch on Racism...

If you don't like the Cosby Show you're probably a racist. I mean you don't have to love or anything, but as long as you like it a little, than we're cool.

To Serve and Protect

Did the police really need Batman to stop the Penguin? I think if a cop can't shoot a fat guy floating away on an umbrella, then he should go back to working the night shift at Office Depot where he belongs.

In the Land of Disney...

In the land of Disney, Goofy and Pluto were both dogs. However, Goofy wears cloths and a hat, and Pluto runs around on all fours. Disney is full of animals acting as people, but poor Pluto is the only one who has to act like a dog... If you ask me, Pluto has down syndrome and no one has the guts to tell him.

Room for Improvment

Most people see someone walking as just someone walking. I, on the other hand, see a Conga Line that needs improvement.

Another Weather Machine?

How come every bad guy in every cartoon has to try to conquer the world with a machine that controls the weather... you'd think by now the forces of good would just build their own weather machine. Then finally we could all stop worrying about people screwing with the wind cause we'd have our own machine... But I suppose this world just isn't ready for peace.

Remember When Terrorism Was Cool?

When I was a kid a terrorists weren't so bad, in fact they were kinda cool... If Cobra did recruitment and asked me to sign up, I sure as hell would... Just think of all the benefits... I get to drive awesome vehicles, get a cool name that ends with "Viper", and honestly, how many Cobra troops get killed... NONE! they all have parachutes and retreat, how sweet a deal would that be?