Airplane Safety...

Never wear parachute pants on an airplane. Because if there's a shortage of parachutes, everyone will probably assume that you have the best chance of jumping without one... If it is laundry day, and wearing parachute pants is unavoidable just remember... "Can't touch this"

Some of My Stock Tips

I don't know too much about the economy or stocks, but I have heard of a Bull Market and a Bear Market... I'm not sure which would be the better investment, but that sounds like a hell of a fight. My money's on the Bear Market!

If the World Was a Sweeter Place

If your hands were made of ice cream your mother would probably say "Don't lick your hands or else you won't have them anymore." However, they're probably going to melt anyways, so I'd rather enjoy a little ice cream before I lose my hands... That's right even with ice cream hands, I still control my own destiny.

A Thought on the Re-occuring

Sometimes I have a feeling that I 've written something twice... but it's ok cause what are the odds you're having the same feeling about reading it twice?

The Truth about Superman

I think Superman's only true power is that he is "Super Greedy"... I mean come on, he had like every power. Super speed, super strength, he can fly, heat vision... "How bout you save some for the rest of us ya Super Jerk!"

Defending Aquaman's Rep.

I think Aquaman has a lame reputation, and he's just not one of the cooler superheroes. This sucks for aquaman cause it's not like he can try to make friends by inviting them over to his lair. I'd rather just watch the game over at the Batcave without having to use a scuba-suit. However, in Aquaman's defense, he does have the "Hooking up with Mermaids" monopoly on lock-down... One thing is for sure, Aquaman would be a lot cooler if he had a lobster-gun.

I also believe Aquaman should start smoking. I don't know what "Big Truth" has told you about tobacco, but people who smoke are tough and look cool. Besides Aquaman can breathe underwater, I think his lungs can handle a little smoke. Also Aquaman has the whole "aqua" thing covered but he forgot one aspect that could really improve his popularity... Aquaman needs to strap on an eye-patch, and start being a little more "piratey". Thanks to Johnny Depp pirates are cool now, and now so are you Aquaman.