Looting for Dummies

Whenever there's looting it's usually for expensive stuff like TVs and electronics. It makes me wonder, how come nobody ever loots ponies? They're so cute and small, and no one would know the wiser. If anyone asks the ponies weren't stolen, they just ran off... TVs might be nice, but nothing says rich like a living room full of ponies!

Dressed for Success

Wearing a collared shirt and athletic shorts is never acceptable. Unless you're holding some sort of business meeting at the gym. If that's the case, you're probably in the wrong business.

Child's Play

I saw this painted on the side of a daycare and it made me wonder...


Why is Buzz Lightyear shooting the children with a laser? At first I thought it was a threat, letting the kids know they better behave or else a space man will shoot death rays at them. However, maybe they're actually "Imagination Lasers," and Buzz is helping them expand their minds. Either way, if you ask me, this daycare is run by a bunch of drugged out hippies, and my kids will have a blast this summer.

A Fun Fact

Here's a fun fact; if you eat pepperonis by themselves, it's like eating meat flavored potato chips... without the potato chip!

Passive Agression

I try to avoid confrontation. When somone's aruging with me, it's just easier to let them win. However, I don't want people thinking I'm a push-over, so I yell nice things like "YOU MAKE A VERY GOOD POINT!" or "THAT'S A NICE SHIRT, IS IT NEW?!" They walk away feeling like they've won, and I don't have to backdown to anybody.

Smart Humor

A friend mentioned he had just bought a new motherboard for his computer. When I told him one day she'll give birth to a fine young board, he did not laugh. I guess my joke was a little too smart for the guy who buys computer parts. Take that smart guy!

How Polite is He?

He's so polite, he courtesy flushes at the urinal.